The Quarterback

Johnny Squathrust
Johnny was the star of his high school football team, The Razorpigs. He smashed records all throughout his short-lived career and during one of his last games, he threw a pass that launched out of the atmosphere and into the cosmos. This caught the attention of NASA after they received 7.3 million complaints about cable outages. He was hand picked by General Sivkil to accompany them on the mission though they frequently compete for the attention of the doctor. Johnny enjoys running laps and fishing. His favorite shirt states "I'm not as think as you drunk I am." He has never read it correctly.